What Needs to Happen Next on Mad Men: 4-23-2012

Since I know for a fact now that Hollywood & comic people read my blog, feel free to use these ideas. Eventually however you’re going to give me a job.

Don Draper – Since Don has now been defanged, they have gutted the main draw of the show, which has been this handsome scoundrel being scoundrelly. That being the case, either Draper needs to return to form, or they need to make him confront his other continual existential crisis; his next best storyline would be having Dick Whitman exposed, and him having to come clean in front of everyone, and perhaps face a court martial. Just the scenes between Megan and Betty alone would be TV gold.

Roger Sterling – Has become nothing but a joke, and he knows it, too.  

Best thing to do with him is have him experience his final meltdown and realize that his hatred of the Japanese belongs to a world that doesn’t exist any more, and his general contempt for blacks and women make him a man that nobody really wants to deal with. People only tolerate him for his money, including his soon to be ex-sugar baby child bride. He should lose his job & all of his money, and throw himself out of one of those high rise windows.

Bert Cooper – He needs to pull an Emperor Palpatine and come from a power consolidation place that nobody saw coming. It needs to be revealed that he’s been secretly making underhanded deals & stock trades, and exits the scene filthy rich while cutting out every other member of the management/ownership team. Colonel Sanders gets the last laugh.

Lane Pryce – Is about the most useless character in this group. At max interest, he’s just comedy relief. If he’s going to continue, they need to have him morph into a real dark badass like they did with Wesley on Angel, for the exact same reason.

Pete Campbell – If anyone can take Don’s place, it’s this guy. Not that he can legitimately be The Draper, that’s not what I mean…I mean someone with the hubris to think he’s as suave, as charming, or as debonair as Don. And it’d be fun to watch him continually try, only to have reality keep hitting him in the face. As his high school flingie and Lane have recently done. Also, his wife needs to do something really sexually wrong, like get pregnant by another man. Just to watch Pete lose his egotistical male cookies.

 

Joan Holloway – needs to get what Peggy got; an all of a sudden elevated status at the work place, and she can become for real what she’s always been, the Queen Bee. Just watching her whip everybody into shape would be priceless, and then watching her breakdown when she realizes she can’t control everything as well.

Betty Draper - Betty will get dumped again. What would be great to see is her finally breaking out of her childlike stupor and taking control of her life. Maybe even doing role reversal and making Don fall back in love with her, just to toy with him, while screwing Roger on the side, as he’s always wanted Betty.

Peggy Olson – Well…she’s come a long way baby. Peggy’s character has always been about proving that she’s just as [insert trait or quality here] as a man. Congratulations, she’s succeeded, especially at being as underhanded. There’s a pun there. I really see no place left for Peggy to go, because it’s like that when your life is always about trying to prove something instead of just living it. The only other thing I can think of that would be great to see is a total philosophy reversal, where Peggy gets religion and becomes a nun, and becomes a Kirk Cameron type, and starts preaching against the very things she used to love to do.

But these characters have peaked. This is obvious. So if we don’t get some freshness in here, this show is going to become painful to watch.

Young Justice: Downtime_S1_Ep8

(filed under Scorch’s review of Young Justice: Downtime)

"What part of 'JUST AQUALAD' didn't you hear?"

So I’m already liking this one better than Denial because it gots Batman in it, and as usual, he shows up kicking ass, taking no prisoners, making no apologies, and never even breathes heavy. In Got’em City. With Clayface even. Turns out it’s their version of the Danger Room again, but it’s still cool as hell. Yes please. What’s funny is that fake holographic Clayface kicked ALL the kid’s asses. Including Mr. Old Spice underwater. Batman just basically lays down an ultimatum on Homeboy because he’s so unfocused…he’s gotta be 100% on the team, or not at all. Already the premise is better than last time, and has more internal logic.

Aqualad goes home, to Poseidonis, which I swear sounds like an waterborne STD, but anyway, he’s greeted by King Orin aka Arthur aka Aquaman, and they speak Atlantean. Nice touch. Sounds somewhat Middle Eastern in terms of the accent. Kalder runs into Squid Boy…no literally, SQUID BOY, and he sees a living mural of his origin(somewhat tweaked). But AQL is preoccupied, presumably with his lady love. Ah love. It fucks you up no matter what age you are.

So we finally see this universe’s version of Garth, the original Aqualad…pretty damn cool. Also a big flashing red honkin’ *WOOP WOOP* *WARNING* *DANGER* sign. Because if Garth chose to stay behind and stay mystical water warfare, it’s a pretty good sign that Kalder is gonna die, and Garth will become the new Aqualad. Yikes. Tula is there as well, and it seems like Kal has feelings for her…but she’s hiding something. Heh. Aren’t they always. And it seems that it’s only been two months…eight weeks….eight episodes since Young Justice has been formed, so they seem to be clocking this show in real time. Nice.

Holy crap Megan and Superboy have a moment. Makes sense, the two aliens having more of a connection. Wally’s gonna be heartbroken, but isn’t that always the way? And hold up just one sec….why the hell does Megan have FRECKLES? But anyway. Still liking this ep.

Black Manta! Looking cooler than ever! Is initiating an attack on AtlantiMopolis. Cut to Dick and Bruce having a father/son moment on the BBall court. Again, nice. Those little touches always enhance the episode. Meanwhile KalderLad is finding out that he can’t join in any reindeer games because he’s rusty on the ol’ underwater magic since leaving to join the Don’t-Call-Us-Sidekicks Squad.

Then another great family moment with the Flashes. Barry, Wally, and Jay and fams are present. This is made of awesome as it’s clearly honoring comics continuity for the most part. This is why I love this show.

"I know all about it, son. Why you think I knocked my woman up?"

And, King Orin is giving Kalderaan some advice about loving, because he gets it, being torn between two worlds as he is. Especially after announcing that Mera is pregnant n’ all. But of COURSE, they Dawson’s Creek it out, and have lil’ Kally’s heart broken because his two best friends are now fucking, when I assume that Tula used to be with him. So let’s get this straight: he’s gone for two months and Tula & Garth are a couple. I mean Joey and Pacey. But okay. No time to mourn and keep getting those mental images of Garth working your girl over though, Kal….BuhLack Manta strikes!

Aqualad, Aquaman’s brother, Mera, and Tula KICK ASS against Black Manta’s minions. They all use their underwater magicistical powers, and it’s awesome to behold…but then Tula takes a shot to the back as Garth is swimming up and gets taken down. Uh. Two men. One woman. Bad news. Kal figures out that it’s a diversion and swims off.

And then randomly, we all of a sudden get hella information about Artemis. She lives in Gotham City, in an apartment on the North Side, is apparently somewhat poor, her first name actually appears to be Artemis and her last name is CROCK! her mother is asian, and in a wheel chair. Wow. And Artemis has won a full scholarship to Gotham Academy(prestige learning), that she didn’t apply for…and then she’s guilt tripped into going by her mom. We can all relate. I know I can.

Okay if Darth Vader were a water villain, he’d be Black Manta. Never thought that a previously silly villain on SuperFriends could be so cool. And i don’t know if I dig the wisdom of Aquaman leaving the Queen under the watch of HIS BROTHER. That’s a recipe for disaster, much like Kal is experiencing right now, but we’ll see. And OH SHIT! Aqualad turns into Tempest and does an underwater haudoooooken!!! Off the friggin’ chain!! They stop Manta from stealing the newly discovered prehistoric octo thingie that they’ve been studying, but then Manta goes all Predator on they ass and destroys it, because “If he can’t have it, NO ONE CAN!!” Snarkage times a million, I’m loving this.

So they’ve sustained massive damage, but it could’ve been worse…Mera didn’t lose the baby and Tula’s still alive. They suggest that the last remain piece of Baby Dino Squid(which is currently regenerating) be taken to the surface for continued study. Thanks to Matt for reminding me that that’s Starro. Kalder takes the high road with Joey and Pacey, wishes them the best, and he and Garth confirm that there’s no regrets on either side. Very noble. He ports back home and tells Batman that he’s all in.

Final shot…we see that Darth Manta is ALSO an agent of the Light, so whoever the scrag this is has been calling the shots and pulling the OffscreenVille strings since Episode One. Man, they sure know how to weave a story together.

Once again, I loved this episode. Can’t wait to see more.

Young Justice:Infiltrator_S1_Ep6

(filed under Scorch’s Review of Young Justice:Infiltrator)“Who are you?” Kid Flash asked that like a million times this episode, and that really is the central question here. Before I go into the episode, let me say this:

What I like about this show:

-The Animation: This will always make or break an animated show, as it is a visual medium just like comics, and the style of the show will either draw people in or alienate them, and this style is completely working.

-The Characterization: Whether you’re familiar with the comic or not, and you understand which characters are direct translations & which ones were created specifically for the show, the one thing that’s clear is that this is The Breakfast Club with superpowers, and it’s awesome. You have a very clear sense, even six episodes in, who these kids are, and they have a tremendous amount of room to grow, precisely because they are adolescents.

-The Level of Action: They literally never disappoint in this category, because they get that superhero escapism is all about those fantastic abilities that we don’t have, but wish we did, and we want to see super people doing super things, dammit.

-The Level of Continuity: Every episode is attached to all of the ones before it. It’s a simple as that. You can jump in & understand what’s going on, but like a good classic record, you have to experience the whole work to get the largest satisfaction from it.

What I Don’t Like About This Show:

*chirp* *crickets* ……Ummm……nothing.

So we open with Speedy, now Red Arrow, basically doing a one man rescue operation of Dr. Serling Roquette on Infinity Island. I also think that the time & date + location stamp that they do for every scene change is cool. It’s actually amazing how badass they’ve made his character, and I especially like the Street Fighteresque action when he busts through the door & does a combo on one of the guards. So Roquette is being forced to complete an as yet  unknown project for some as yet unknown villainy villainous types, and she complains about Red Arrow being her only rescuer….she wonders if he brought backup. And asks about budget cuts. Not liking this bitch. Bad guys again can’t shoot for shit as they have the escaping pair dead to rights with a slew of automatic weapons, but hey, no show if the grunts can aim. Speedy Arrow leaves them a little present as they depart; I’m liking him even more. He’s a dick, but he can back his shit up. He’s also much more Batmanesque in his approach, because he clearly doesn’t give a damn what anyone thinks about his activities. So turns out that whatever Roquette was working is indeed operational, and The Sensei and Professor Ojo are “good to go.”

So back on Mount Justice & the gang is having a day at the beach, while it seems that Wally unfortunately has had to start school. This sequence was funny in how it zoomed in on M’gann(even green cartoon babes in bikinis make guys drool), but also, it made me realize the diversity of the team. Did or does Aqualad go to school? Did he do so in Atlantis, do they even raise their kids that way? M’gann basically hangs around at Mount Justice all day, does J’onn teach her anything, or does she just watch MTV? Same with Connor, he’s got no family….so only Dick & Wally actually go to school. It’s like a combination of foreign exchange students, home schoolers, private schoolers, and public school kids. Nice. Robin is funny as hell with his “moment of silence.” Again, this is indeed the wisecracking, show boating kid that Dick Grayson is supposed to be, and I love it. UmmmthatsandmoundoverSuperboy

wasaquickdirtyjokelikehisdickwashard.

So the main idea/plot/focus of this episode is the fact that Artemis, who is functionally Arrowette,  is now being introduced to the group, in exactly the same way that M’gann was, but somehow…it just doesn’t feel right. Kid Flash senses it right away, and so does the audience. Anyone with any knowledge of Teen Titans history immediately all thought the same thing: Terra. It’s clearly the Judas Contract all over again, especially since they named the friggin’ episode “Infiltrator.” This storyline was also done in the recent animated Teen Titans series as well(and they had a much better theme song). But the writers seem to say in interviews that Artemis is not an Amazon, nor Arrowette, nor Mia/Speedy, or whatever. So we’ll see, but somethin’ ain’t right about her.

Sure are a lotta nieces goin' on around here.

So Red Arrow tells ‘em that ‘The Fog’ was the weapon that Dr. Roquette created, and how insidious it is. The League of Shadows ain’t playin’, dammit! I still don’t quite understand Red Arrow’s motives, because he keeps trashing the group & the concept behind it, yet he keeps showing up and being a part of their missions. We’ll have to see how that plays out as well.

The Doc is at Happy Harbor High(HAH!), and more continuity points for using their ‘cloaked’ uniforms. Aqualad requests that Miss Martian hooks the team up telepathically, and hilarity ensues. There’s just such rich comedic potential in having super powered teenagers mentally accessible to one another, and this episode doesn’t miss a beat of it. Robin helps Kid Flash realize that Artemis was the one who shot the arrow that helped them in their fight with Amazo(CONTINUITY RULEZ I TELL YA!!!)….all while they’re in each other’s heads. Again, so much about this makes sense…the doctor has the typical “it’s not a weapon it’s science!!” attitude that so many scientists do, when they create something & refuse to see its potential use from every angle, Aqualad is typically stoic & noble, a young man of few words, but when he does speak, it counts, and the doc even recognized that tracking The Fog would also let the League know where she is. I know all of that seems like minor quibbles, but little things add up.

“Mmmm that boy.” Artemis doesn’t take long to start unapologetically diggin’ on Connor, that’s fer damn sure. I thought it was interesting that Miss Martian could reconfigure her ship to be piloted by Robin, and even stranger that he’d somehow know what to do inside of her ship…maybe she has some kind of autopilot, or maybe she’s walked through some training in the use of her ship for the other members of the group. What we also eventually need to know, and Superman recognized this too, is exactly what Connor can and cannot do. Sometimes it seems like he has all of Superman’s powers, sometimes it seems like he doesn’t.  So Cheshire manages to slip into the high school while M’gann & Artemis are bickering, and quickly outwits Kid Flash…but then she dumps his unconscious body in the pool. Clearly she meant to kill him, because he’d drown in minutes…so why didn’t she just stab him? So they have a brief but intense fight, and Cheshire bamfs out of there…I also have to wonder how M’gann can’t see or read Artemis’ deception. This was the same problem I had with Identity Crisis, and I wrote Brad Meltzer an email & told him so, because it’s hard to buy a telepath being on a team and then telling a story about deception. It’s obvious that Artemis is hiding stuff, so M’gann should pick up on it. But anyway,

So Robin & Superboy see Star Labs get trashed, & they regroup for round two. So then we have the two biggest *headdesk* moments of the episode, both by Aqualad. Moment 1: He tells Kid Flash and Artemis to “stop it” because he can somehow HEAR THEM GLARING. Um…what? Unless he was being funny, that makes no sense at all…exactly what mental sound is made when you glare? Moment 2: For some reason, he tells Miss Martian, OUT LOUD, to stay cloaked & make a perimeter sweep. Um, WHAT? The only reason in retrospect that I think he did that was to maybe throw off any assailants that might be nearby. If that’s the case, then it was strategy, no harm no foul. So Spider-Man….erm, I mean Black Spider, The Hook(brilliant name) and Cheshire show up, and knock the fuck outta Aqualad, which rarely happens on this show. So they fight fight fight until we see that Roquette is actually M’gann in disguise(I LOVE that ploy), so maybe that’s a clue as to what Aquadude was doing earlier.

Cut to the real Roquette, and she’s desperately trying to upload her anti-virus virus cure viral-non-virally defoggy halitosis cure thingy. So the next question obviously is…how the FUCK did Aqualad go from being knocked out on the ground to where the doctor was? The only way that sequence works is if when Aqualad was speaking, that was actually M’gann in disguise as Aqualad…and then once the villains leave she zooms back into the high school invisibly and takes on Roquette’s form while telepathically hurling debris at the criminals. If that’s the case, then kudos all around. Robin realizes that if The Fog hacks Wayne Tech, they’ll eventually get to the Batcave, and can’t let that happen…I love how he freaks out over that.

So it seems that Cheshire infra reds some footprints, so maybe that was the real Aqualad…that doesn’t make sense that he recovered & relocated that fast then, but whatever. So Cheshire could’ve just hurled a sai at Dr. Roqy but that woulda been too easy…Robin n’ Superboy at Wayne Tech confront Cylcops…I mean, Dr. Ojo and Connor charges ahead as usual. The coolest part about this sequence was Robin using an override command inside of Wayne Tech. Superboy as usual gets his shirt burned off. This is a theme with him. Cheshire spares Roquette because she finishes her nanobyte penicillin…and says that the Shadows may need her again someday. Um, okay. She shoulda just killed her. Robin uploads the cure, and “the infiltrators have been outfiltrated!” Robin and his made up words, I swear.

"You don't wanna know the shit I know."

So of course the big deal is when Arrowette/Artemis stops Cheshire, she’s unmasked, and threatens to expose all of blondie’s secrets…which then prompts Lil’ Arrow Pimpette to let her go. Hmmm…the plot thickens. The gang smells a rat, but welcome her to the team anyway.

On a side note, M’Gann’s statement about having 12 sisters or whatever on Mars in effect continues the retcon of J’onn. Initially J’onn was the only surviving member of his race…but comic readers also know that M’Gann is actually a White Martian posing as a Green Martian because she hates her White Martian heritage. We’ll see what they do with that.

Blonde Arrow then teleports to a phone booth in Gotham City which was awesome, and is confronted by Red Arrow, who basically tells her that he knows she’s not Ollie’s niece, and that he knows that Bats & GA are lying about Artemis…but he chooses to trust them for now. He issues a warning to Artemis though, and I swear, Roy acts more like Batman was his mentor than Ollie. Finally we see Sensei again, and the counsel of light talking about the gang…seems like the Wayne Tech was their goal all along, but then they speak of an operative INSIDE Young Justice.

They’re being so heavy handed and obvious with this thing until I’m not quite sure where they’re going with it…we don’t know who Artemis is…if she’s not the traitor, who is? My vote is for either M’gann or Red Tornado. We’ll see. All in all, another great episode, and I can’t wait to see what’s next!

...Somebody's gonna bite the big one.

Young Justice:Schooled_S1_Ep5

(filed under Scorch’s Review of Young Justice:Schooled)

This episode was fun, because I love the show, but it doesn’t really make a lot of sense. The internal logic is way off, and some decisions are way out of character.

The opening sequence finds trouble in Metropolis, as a bridge explosion is triggered. We see Bruce looking down from Wayne Tower, he flips back a bust(which is a wink to the campy 60′s Adam West Batman show), and out pops his costume from a top drawer. But then we see Superman zooming in, holding the bridge up and repairing it with his heat vision. So far, so cool.

Connor, however, zooms in with a super leap, and lands too hard on the bridge with his signature entrance. It momentarily startles Superman, but he recovers. Connor tries to rescue the bus, but Superman takes it. They have yet another confrontation, as Superman just continually refuses to directly deal with both who and what Connor is. Connor keeps reaching out, but Kal won’t engage. That still feels a bit out of character for me…because it’s not like Superman to run from his problems, even when they make him uncomfortable. What’s even more out of character is that Superman would let a powerful being like Connor, which he is partly(although it was unbeknownst to him) responsible for creating, run around and basically ignore him, pretending that the problem was dealt with. Batman radios him and says, “We need to talk.”

So Black Canary is brought in to help with training. Makes sense, because she and Wonder Woman along with Batman are all masters at hand to hand. Black Canary specifically focuses on Judo, which has to do with using your opponent’s actions against them. Of course Kid Flash, whose horniness apparently knows no bounds, steps up to spar, flirting with Canary. Holy crap that’s an invitation for ass kickery, which he then receives. I don’t quite get how Canary is faster than a Flash, but maybe we can chalk that up to Wally’s inexperience with his powers. She then calls out Connor, and he, as usual, is angry and believes he’s above training given his power level. She of course knocks him on his ass, but senses his struggle, and offers to be there for him when he’s ready. Again, I don’t know how Canary would be faster than Connor, but we’ll chalk that one up to Connor’s inexperience as well. Now I wanna see Canary vs. Batman and Canary vs. Superman.

So the main villain then shows up, and right off the bat, let me say that Amazo is a problem by his very definition. A machine that can record & then somehow mimic ALL THE POWERS OF THE JUSTICE LEAGUE. Batman himself says that it took eight leaguers four hours to beat & dismantle him. But he doesn’t say how. So right off the bat I knew that when the kids beat him, it wasn’t going to make any sense, after a set up like that.

But then….the biggest dumbassery that I’ve seen on the show yet. Batman says that Amazo’s parts are going to be shipped to two separate Star Lab locations for study. Here are the problems with that idea….

First of all, two collections of Amazo’s part are too few. He should’ve had them split into six or more separate units, and he would’ve had at least one of them coming back to the BatCave. GuarandamnTEE you Batman would’ve done that.

Secondly, why in the friggin world would Batman put them in armored cars when Superman, Flash, Wonder Woman and J’onn could’ve had them were they needed to be in seconds?

Thirdly, which had me doing the biggest facepalm of all…Batman says there will be four extra decoy trucks, and that the kids will be assigned to follow the real trucks. Well…DUHR…if I was Professor Ivo, or ANYONE, all you’d have to do is follow the trucks that the YJer’s are following and ignore the others. *headdesk* I thought that Batman was pulling a bait & switch, which would’ve been more in character, and we were gonna find out that the kids were actually with the decoy trucks to throw anyone off the scent. But no, there they were. Stupid. Especially stupid to put the KIDS in charge of guarding the transport. Untrained agents covering cargo that powerful.

Lastly, Batman would’ve already known that the parts were GPS tagged, because he would’ve examined them for that very thing before shipping them off, especially if Robin could figure that out in seconds. *smh* The writers dropped the ball on this one.

We have a brief interlude where Bruce is confronting Clark in a diner, and challenging him to be the father that Connor needs him to be. Clark gets pissed at that, and takes his apple pie to go, and that’s the end of it. Again, that just feels a little uncharacteristic to me…Superman of all people wouldn’t shirk his duty, no matter how personally distasteful. That’s a little too Superman Returns for me.

So, the expected happens, and M.O.N.Q.I.S show up, strangely laughing like hyenas, or the Wicked Witch’s pets, and of course overwhelm the YJers. Seems like they have kryptonite power beams, because they manage to hurt Superboy with their blasts, and simply outnumber everyone else. One thing I’ve noticed on this show, so far, is that Aqualad NEVER gets his ass kicked, so he must be a writer favorite. It was also interesting to see Kid Flash’s reaction to Megan growing more arms. I’m sure that they are going to make her alien heritage more of an issue as time goes in. So yada yada, Robin figures out how to track them, and off they go.

Superboy, on the other hand, is still so enraged at his ‘father’s’ rejection, and the continual comparisons, that he charges off after the M.O.N.Q.I.S, determined to fight them on his own. Just great. He encounters Professor Ivo, who looks more like the comic version of Toyman, and a completely reassembled and repowered Amazo. Which again, could’ve been prevented if all of his android guts weren’t simply being transported in two cases. But anyway. Amazo begins to do his thing, and kick all possible ass, which is the only thing that could happen, given the fact that he can access any of the League’s powers. Which also automatically makes him more than a match for the YJers. Aqualad gave a few field orders, but what’s missing this time is the leadership needed to coordinate the attack against Amazo.

So Amazo kicks Superboy’s ass all the way to Robin’s school, and Robin, Kid Flash, and Superboy are all they are to take him on. And continually get pummeled while Ivo looks on and laughs. Somehow then, Superboy gets an epiphany when Amazo accesses Black Canary, and he begins to fake a rage fit. I’m guessing to try and put the fight on his terms, and not Amazo’s. The team keeps coming at him, and predictably, he keeps switching powers, but when he becomes intangible like J’onn, Superboy sticks his fist in his head, and when he resolidifies, his head explodes and he keels over. Aqualad and Megan come charging in after it’s all over. Ivo has escaped. There was also an arrow that was shot in the middle of the fight, signifying the presence of an archer, but not the one we think.

So they’re back at Mount Justice getting their mission debriefing, and again, it’s “You did a good job, except for your fuck ups,” which this time were all pretty much on Superboy. Batman congratulates them again on adapting in the field and learning the value of teamwork; Robin accuses Green Arrow of babysitting, but then they compare arrows, and they all see that it’s not Ollie’s arrow. They then assume that it’s Speedy, but maybe it’s Mia/Artemis. We’ll see. Superboy, of course, has humbled himself, and is ready to receive training from Black Canary, and she reaches out in a mentorly/motherly way, which I thought was very heartwarming.

My main problem with this ep is how out of character Batman was written. It was extremely foolish of him to put the UNTRAINED KIDS in harm’s way up against someone like Amazo, because he could’ve killed them all. What if Superboy hadn’t had that idea? They would’ve been toast.

But in any event, it introduced one of the League’s deadliest villains, we saw some progress with Connor accepting help even though he’s still angry that his ‘father’ hasn’t accepted him, we know that there’s still an archer somewhere in the mix, and Ivo is free to wreak more havoc.

Still very excited about what’s to come.